New Age Crap

I wrote this years ago when I was attending a massage therapy school. I had made bodywork my professional career for about 15 years thereafter but just never could accept the hype and the dogma. This sentiment also applies to the self-righteousness I encountered later in other endeavors, like martial arts, dance and philosophy.

Chorus

I really think they miss the point
It’s just another fad
Everybody is doing it
It’s really totally rad
But in the end after all the stuff
When all is said and done
New Age fans are no better off
Than plain folks having fun
It’s just New Age crap
It’s just New Age crap

Verses

Everybody walkin' around, giving me the rap
What to eat and what to drink, showing me their map
Stand this way and walk that way and tuck your pelvis under
Release that block and open up, experience the wonder
Visualize and let it go, breath into the pain
Balance out the energy, imagine you are sane
Chant the sounds and see it now, exercise your spine
Encounter feelings, drop your armor, confront your own stop signs

See the my theory, check my system, it’s obvious that I know
How to reach the higher spaces, while you are really low
You don’t fit into the picture, the one I know is right
What you’re doing ain’t for real, you can’t see the light
You really have to breath this way, or else you got it wrong
You really have to sing this way, or else it ain’t a song
Something needs to be improved, to find a better way
As things are you can’t be right, if so I’d get no pay